- mom: oh be careful! the stove is hot
- me: The stove is hot? The stove is hot? You have the entire English language, with its vast spectrum of adjectives to describe the stove and you settle for "hot"? You have done it a great disservice. The stove is far beyond beautiful. The stove is enamoring, enrapturing, captivating, ravishing, lovely, incredible, overwhelming, adorable, alluring, enticing, and radiant. It's a stunner- it'll take your breath away before you have a chance to introduce yourself. It's eyes, constantly shine with joy, even in the midst of pain or sadness. It's a fireball that I can barely handle, but I can tell you wouldn't stand a chance. It has a mind that could tear yours to shreds, considering the one word you chose to describe it with is "hot". Don't ever degrade my stove like that again.
extreme makeover: home edition
- girl: i kinda like horses.
- ty: WE MADE YOUR ROOM INTO A HORSE AND DECORATED IT WITH HORSES AND HERE WE GOT YOU 3 PET HORSES AND WE ARE PAYING FOR SURGERY TO MAKE YOU A HORSE.
Me in class.
- Me: okay, gotta focus. Big test coming up.
- Me: ooooh, when did that poster get there?
- Me: ugh, split ends.
- Me: why is the back of your head so attractive?!
- Me: HOW DID YOU GET THAT ANSWER?
- Me: just act like you understand.
- Me: don't pick me, don't pick me...
- Me: so here's my number, so call me maybe.
- Me: DAMN THAT SONG IT'S SO FUCKING CATCHY.
- Me: it's only been fifteen minutes?
- Me: I hate you all.
- Me: someone shoot me.<p> </p><p class="gone"><a href="http://goo.gl/1Wz2g"><i><strong>Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard</strong></i></a></p>
- period: WAKE UP ASSHOLE, YOU GOT CRAMPS.
- period: How bout an entire chocolate cake for breakfast?
- period: How's that back pain? Feeling better? Let's fix that.
- period: Corneas glance by a VS magazine on the table. Instantly horny.
- period: Find a cookie as big as a house and eat it.
- period: See a male specimen of any kind. Instantly horny.
- period: Where's your Tic Tac box filled with ibuprofen?
- period: Got things to do? Don't care. Sleep.
- period: See a female specimen of any kind. Instantly horny.
- period: For dinner you're eating an entire bag of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
- period: Breeze blows by. Instantly horny.
- period: You didn't like those brand new underwear right?
- period: Yell at a puppy.
- period: Close eyes and wait for repeat tomorrow.
Let’s switch roles this time.
This time, I’ll be the one to hurt you, make sure I lose connections with you and have you cry at night. I won’t be the one in pain, i won’t be the one losing sleep, and ultimately, I won’t be the one to get hurt anymore. Let’s see how much of this you can take because when you did it to me, I took so much of it. You don’t realize how much it hurts till you experience it.
(Source: euniceepark, via stevenbong)
Honestly, I hold in a lot.
When I’m upset, I really don’t like to tell anyone. Especially the person who made me that way. No matter how much anyone asks, the answer will always be, “I’m fine.” Even if its not true.
(Source: therealphillyz, via stevenbong)
